ALL BLACKS. . .The Musical

ALL BLACKS: THE MUSICAL

Starring
Glamour Diva
GalaxyMafia

Wentworth Miller
Adam Rodriguez
Gabrielle Union

and

The All Blacks


ACT ONE
Scene One

In a 20,000 sq.ft. mansion in Bel Air, CA, best-selling author Glamour Diva and Wentworth Miller, star of “Prison Break” argue about their relationship. GD and Wentworth have been together for a year, and GD has only recently discovered that her boyfriend has been cheating on her with Gabrielle Union.

GLAMOUR DIVA
“Caught out there” by Kelis

Last year - Valentine's Day
You would just warmly say
“Babe I love you, love you. . .babe I swear”
Held you when you were sick
Heavin...
The whole time I think to myself, this isn't fair

WENTWORTH MILLER
“My Way” by Limp Bizkit

Special
You think you're special
You do I can see it in your eyes
I can see it when you laugh at me
Look down on me
You walk around on me
Just one more fight
About your leadership
And I will straight up
Leave your shit
Cause I've had enough of this
And now I'm pissed

GLAMOUR DIVA

What is this I see (No)
You don’t come home to me (Oh, no)
When you don’t come home to me (Man)
Can’t deal, can’t bear
You keep tellin’ me lies
But to your surprise
Look, I found her red coat
And you’re. . .bitch
Caught out there

WENTWORTH MILLER
Just one more fight
About a lot of things
And I will give up everything
To be on my own again
Free again

GLAMOUR DIVA

So sick of your games, I’ll set your ass in flames
And watch it blow up, blow up, tell me:
How you gonna see Gabby now
So far from sincere, fabrications in my ear
Drive me so far up the wall, I come slidin’ down
What is this I see (I don't believe this)
You don’t come home to me
When you don’t come home to me
I can’t deal, can’t bear (I won't)
You keep tellin’ me lies
But to your surprise
Look, I hope you're happy
Since you're
Caught out there

WENTWORTH

Just one more fight
And I'll be history
Yes I will straight up
Leave your shit
And you'll be the one who's left
Missing me

GLAMOUR DIVA
I hate you so much right now
I hate you so much right now
Aaaaah
I hate you so much right now
I hate you so much right now
I hate you so much right now
Aaaaah

[Disgusted by what he views as GD’s pedantic behavior, WENTWORTH leaves the house]

ACT ONE
Scene Two

Across town, galaxyMafia is arguing with current flame, CSI:Miami star, Adam Rodriguez. GM has just learned that Adam has been carrying on an affair with Gabrielle Union, who was one of GM’s good friends. At least she was until the bitch pulled a Denise Richards.

GALAXY MAFIA
“Fine” by Whitney Houston

All those sweet (sweet) sweet kisses (yeah)
And those sweet (sweet) red roses (yeah)
They convinced me it was youI made you (you) exclusive (yeah)
Now it's so (now it’s conclusive that) conclusive
That you wasn’t doing it too.

ADAM RODRIGUEZ
[gives GM his trademark sexy, crooked smile]

GALAXYMAFIA
If you’d told me from the start that you’re playing around
It would have been fine…
Then I would have played too and I guess I would have had a good time.

If you’d told me from the start that you’re playing around
It would have been fine…
Then I would have played too and I guess I would have had a good time.
Something didn’t feel right, and I wish I knew itI just could not see your games
I got respect for you, and you put me through it
Why would you bring me so much pain.

ADAM RODRIGUEZ
“Ain’t No Fun” by Snoop Dogg

I had respect for you lady
But now I take it all back
Cuz you gave me all yo pu$$y
And you even licked my balls

GALAXY MAFIA
I hate you so much right now!!
I hate you so much right now!!

[Enraged by ADAM’s flippant, unrepentant attitude, galaxyMafia leaves the apartment]

ACT ONE
Scene Three

THE GREEK CHORUS OF ONE: MISS SAKAMOTO
“Love TKO” by Teddy Pendergrass

I think they better let it go
Looks like another love T.K.O.


ACT ONE
Scene Four


A month passes. Both GLAMOURDIVA and GALAXYMAFIA are both heartbroken and disappointed by their failed relationships. Even though the ladies have plenty to keep them busy with work, writing, personal appearances and (in GD’s case at least) sleeping, they still lament their respective lost loves.

One day, GLAMOUR DIVA comes across an old photo of her and WENTWORTH during happier times. At the same time, GALAXYMAFIA finds a love letter ADAM wrote to her.

Though in separate locations, the ladies both sing the same song.

GLAMOUR DIVA/GALAXYMAFIA
“Stronger than pride” by Sade

I won’t pretend that I intend to stop living
I won’t pretend, I’m good at forgiving
Oh, I can’t hate you
Though I have tried
I still really, really love you
Love is stronger than pride


ACT ONE
Scene Five

One month later, GLAMOUR DIVA is trying to pick up the pieces of her broken heart when she receives a message on her cell phone from MA’A NONU, a New Zealand rugby star who plays for the All Blacks. GD had met MA’A several months ago when she traveled to Auckland as a special guest of the ambassador to help recruit more African-Americans to the country. Upon meeting the tasty young player, GD had to restrain herself from smackin’ her lips. . .after all, everyone knows black people luvs eatin’ chicken and MA’A was a juicy, tender chicken but, GD was, at the time, totally committed to making things worth with beau, WENTWORTH MILLER. She and MA’A had secretly exchanged numbers, and MA’A had wanted her to do an “international booty call”, even going so far as sending plane tickets via overnight mail so she could join him in Kiwi-land. GD was tempted but wanted to concentrate on one man at a time.

However, with WENTWORTH seemingly out of the picture, GD found herself listening more attentively to the message MA’A left.

MA’A NONU
“Lonely Girl” by Jon B

He started out takin' you out
Doin' what any man would do
Sayin' any and everything to just get wit you
I can't say I blame him for a girl as fine as you
So he played you out, ain't no doubt
He was runnin' game on you
After all the fun he was through with you
Any way that it goes down girl, he's the one that's gonna lose

Don't cry lonely girl
If you need somebody girl
I know you feel deserted
And you can't find your way back home

I will show you girl
The way that love should feel
You ain't suppose to be hurtin'
And you don't have to be alone

Later that night, GD called GM and asked her advice

GD
Do you think I should visit Ma’a in NZ?

GM
Why not? What’s keeping you here? Certainly not that dumbfuck zebra Wentworth.

GD
Yeah but. . .Ma’a is very young.

GM
The younger they are, the juicier they are! I think it’s just what you need right now, some tender, succulent, hot chicken!

GD
I don’t know. . .I’m still so upset about what happened with Wentworth.

GM
I know. . .and I’m upset about what happened with Adam but. . .

GD
Maybe you ought to come too. You could hook up with that guy you met in that bar the last time we were down there.

GM
Who? That drunk island nigga that didn’t know how to hold his liquor? The one who was fighting?

GD
You know you like ‘em rough neck...

GM
Yeah. . .that’s true. He may be crazy as hell but he’s tall and fine and at the end of the day, that’s all that matters.

GD
Okay. . .so, we’re going to NZ for tender, young chickens.

GM
I’ll ask Miss Sakamoto to make the arrangements.


THE GREEK CHORUS OF ONE: MISS SAKAMOTO
“Maneater” by Hall and Oates

Oh, oh here they come
Watch out boys, they’ll chew you up
Oh, oh here they come
They some maneaters
Watch out boys, watch out boys!



copyright 2006. . .galaxyMafia
 

2 comments so far.

  1. jadedKiss 5:46 PM, October 02, 2006
    gurl you're too funny! crazy stuff.. as i am starting to find is the norm here!!
  2. ironmunki 3:34 PM, October 06, 2006
    lol! you girls are friggin' crazy!

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