News Item – Derrick Davenport…DAMN!
Last weekend, Galaxy Mafia and I paid a visit to one of our local corporate Mega-bookstores to peruse the stacks of books and magazines in search of fodder for our blog. Boy did we ever find it! You’ll be reading more from GM later but I have to tell you about the hot, hot, HOT guy we discovered! Ladies (and Gentlemen) run, don’t walk, to your nearest book store and pick up the April issue of Playgirl Magazine. You read that right, PLAYGIRL. On the cover is THE most handsome, fine ass man I’ve seen in years! YEARS DEAR READER! His name is Derrick Davenport and he is quite the naughty angel indeed! Now normally I wouldn’t have soiled my beautifully manicured hands with a Playgirl (No I’m serious! I wouldn’t have!) but there was just something about the way he looked at me. I mean my bosom actually heaved! If I’d been wearing a bodice it would have been ripe for the ripping! Jiminy Crickets that’s a good looking man!
But I digress…
You see the reason I don’t care for Playgirl is because it’s just a tad too pedestrian for my taste (read: Not nearly naughty enough). Ms. GD has very exotic taste when it comes to sex and just looking at naked men is not enough to make this girl blush! And when I read the accompanying dim-witted questions that were posed to Mr. Davenport well, that just made me want to gag even more. Playgirl is supposed to be this bastion of male objectification, a guilt free zone where women are allowed to ogle naked men at their leisure. So why have any questions at all? Listen up Playgirl! This is what truly enlightened women want from their naked man pics:
1. Name – We really don’t give a damn what his name is but it does cut down on confusion since there are about 6.5 billion humans on the planet and half of them are male. We can’t call all of them “it”!
2. Measurements – Height, weight, biceps, neck, thighs, shoe size (Ms. GD would add penis length and width, erect and flaccid. Also sexual orientation, bi-sexual or heterosexual works well for me. I’d also like a short paragraph on what sex acts said naked man enjoys and whether or not he considers himself kinky or vanilla – for research purposes only of course).
See how simple it is? All we need is name, rank, and serial number. Who cares what his favorite color is or what he finds attractive in women? Besides it’s all lies anyway! All we need to know is whether or not he’s worthy to have sushi eaten off him!
If you’re too cheap to buy the magazine and too shy to even go look at it but you’d still like to see Mr. Davenport then you’re in luck. Steve Henry, Jr. is an excellent photographer who specializes in beautiful men (God bless you Steve!) and has many fine photos of Derrick and others on his website, http://stevehenrymen.com. Once you’re there click on “stallions” then click Derrick’s name. Please make sure you have a towel handy before you begin! – GD
But I digress…
You see the reason I don’t care for Playgirl is because it’s just a tad too pedestrian for my taste (read: Not nearly naughty enough). Ms. GD has very exotic taste when it comes to sex and just looking at naked men is not enough to make this girl blush! And when I read the accompanying dim-witted questions that were posed to Mr. Davenport well, that just made me want to gag even more. Playgirl is supposed to be this bastion of male objectification, a guilt free zone where women are allowed to ogle naked men at their leisure. So why have any questions at all? Listen up Playgirl! This is what truly enlightened women want from their naked man pics:
1. Name – We really don’t give a damn what his name is but it does cut down on confusion since there are about 6.5 billion humans on the planet and half of them are male. We can’t call all of them “it”!
2. Measurements – Height, weight, biceps, neck, thighs, shoe size (Ms. GD would add penis length and width, erect and flaccid. Also sexual orientation, bi-sexual or heterosexual works well for me. I’d also like a short paragraph on what sex acts said naked man enjoys and whether or not he considers himself kinky or vanilla – for research purposes only of course).
See how simple it is? All we need is name, rank, and serial number. Who cares what his favorite color is or what he finds attractive in women? Besides it’s all lies anyway! All we need to know is whether or not he’s worthy to have sushi eaten off him!
If you’re too cheap to buy the magazine and too shy to even go look at it but you’d still like to see Mr. Davenport then you’re in luck. Steve Henry, Jr. is an excellent photographer who specializes in beautiful men (God bless you Steve!) and has many fine photos of Derrick and others on his website, http://stevehenrymen.com. Once you’re there click on “stallions” then click Derrick’s name. Please make sure you have a towel handy before you begin! – GD
