ALL BLACKS: The (real) Player Diaries

Category: , , By Glamour Diva & galaxyMafia
All Blacks Player Diaries – The Rejected Drafts

Ever wonder what the All Blacks players really meant to write in their "Player Diaries"? Well, wonder no more. galaxyMafia has gone behind enemy lines (so to speak) to find the "rejected" drafts of the "Player Diaries" so you can see what wasn't shown on the website! These are the diaries the NZRU never wanted you to see!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chris Masoe

Dear Diary, I was up about 7.30am today, which is pretty early but I wanted to get to the gym first thing.
Translation: I woke up, took a sh!t, jerked off and dragged my sorry ass down to the gym.

It was a day off for us and I had a couple of options, like sailing or a Sky Tower bungy jump, but I choose to spend it with my partner.
Translation: Dat fool Ted finally gave us a day off. Dat punk will work a nigga. Anyway, of course, I wanted to f**k my b!tch

Things are pretty quiet in my room because I’m rooming with Roks (Joe Rokocoko) and it’s like living alone because all the Auckland guys can stay at home when we’re up here.
Translation: Roks punk ass ain't here so I can fart, masturbate and inspect the sh!t I dig out of my nose in peace

After breakfast I hopped on the bike at the gym because I was a little bit tight after the game. Taking a heavy knock on the weekend I felt I needed to do a bit of recovery.
Translation: Chabal knocked the ever-living sh!t outta me and I couldn’t do nothin’ but get on the bike, and I had a hard time with dat.

The tackle

Everybody has seen the hit put on me Sebastien Chabal but I had no idea there was anyone lining me up. I was just focused on catching the ball and not knocking it on. I think the damage was done when my head hit the ground – not the tackle.

Translation: I feel like such a candy-ass punk b!tch. Chabal knocked the f*ck outta me and I felt every nanosecond

Some people have been saying I should have learned from my brother, who is a boxer, and taken the eight count on the ground.
Translation: Even my brother thinks I’m a candy-ass punk b!tch

After the gym I met my girlfriend who had come up for the weekend. We just chilled out down the waterfront and then we, or she, did a bit of shopping.
Translation: After the gym, I met my girlfriend - the one from Welly, not Gemma. Anyway, I f*cked that b!tch til she mooed like a Waikato cow

We have been in Auckland since last Sunday and being away from families can be tough on some of the guys.

Translation: My b!tch say my kids miss me but I’ll see dem rugrats when I see ‘em. Besides, dat’s what the baby mama is for

I have three kids in Wellington and it’s tough not seeing them when we’re out of town. Sarah is seven Christian is six and Rylee is three. Christian plays league at the moment because he loves tackling and in rugby they don’t tackle at that young age.
Translation: I got four kids but I only claim three. Sarah is seven and Christian is nine. . .? Wait, wait, I think Rylee is seven and Sarah is three and. . .ah, shit, just ask they mamas, I don’t know

He’s pretty solid for his age and he plays in the Under 8 grade. I don’t mind what they play because I just enjoy watching and supporting them. It’s a lot of fun watching kids that age running around no matter what they play.

Translation: My boy plays kiddy rugby. Pee wee rugby games are a good place to meet hos. Kids are good pussy magnets. B!tches love men who care about they kids.

After shopping I visited my sister and brother and we had a BBQ so that was good catching up. With Island BBQ’s you have to watch what you eat but there was a salad there so it wasn’t all meat.

Translation: I went to see my family. We picked up a bucket of KFC and some malt liquor. And my sister thinks I’m a candy ass for letting Chabal knock the f*ck outta me, too.

We all need to watch what we eat because it’s fuel to keep the body running right and at this level you have to be professional in everything you do.
Translation: I didn't eat too much fried chicken 'cause I don’t want to get like them fat f*cks Tialata and Schwalger!

I was home pretty early so I watched a bit of TV and chilled out before bed at 10pm.
Translation: Back at the hotel, I took a long shit, jerked off, smoked some trees and fell asleep

And that was my day.

Cheers, Mussey.
Translation: Deuce niggas, Mussey

copyright 2007. . .galaxyMafia will bring you more rejected drafts soon!

3 comments so far.

  1. Kristin 12:39 AM, June 08, 2007
    More! That was funnnnnnny!
  2. Natalina 6:51 AM, June 08, 2007
    LOL, nice job GalaxyMafia...
  3. debalina 3:18 PM, June 09, 2007
    LOL! Awesome!

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