Caught Out There With The Sushi Girls™ – Episode 7

Category: , , , , , , By Glamour Diva & galaxyMafia
I'm sure I'm going to piss off quite a few people with this entry but I don't care. Like to hear it, here it go:

It's my baby mama (yeanknow) I want child support
She get boyfriend checks, but I stay in court
It's my baby mama (yeanknow) she be ridin' Cady
And she always lookin' for sugar daddies
It's my baby daddy (yeanknow) he be always broke
And he aint no good nothin', but a joke
It's my baby daddy (yeanknow) he just love to have it
He be cheatin' on me that's why I can't stand em'

Baby Mama – Three 6 Mafia

I shouldn't have loved him
I shouldn't have wanted him
I shouldn't have trusted him
No I shouldn't have fucked him
Now here I am carryin’ his seed
That makes two for him and a fourth for me

Baby Daddy – Queen Pen

Well Dear Readers if you haven’t heard by now then you must live under a rock or else maybe you just don’t give a damn about rugby but the secret is out, along with the placenta – Jerry Collins is a daddy! They don’t call him “The Hit Man” for nothing right?

Tabloids all over the rugby-crazed world are chomping at the bit about the hush-hush “Love Child” (Honestly, who under the age of 60 uses that phrase anymore?) that reared its chubby cheeked, squinty-eyed, bald head over the weekend. The Paparazzi were all up in the baby mama’s face asking her all sorts of impertinent questions and, ya know, I feel her pain. Peeps have been blowin’ up The Sushi Girls™ email with questions and more questions about the 411 on JC, his bundle of joy and the woman who birthed it! So to stem the flow of questions before it reaches tsunami proportions, I’ve decided to break my Holiday silence and let the whole world know the scoop…wait for it…THERE…IS…NONE!

Our New Zealand source’s lips are clamped tighter than Dick Cheney’s hands on his chest during heart attack number ten! In fact the only information I could get is from a Cook Island source that confirms JC is currently spending a few days in Rarotonga. I can’t corroborate what, if anything, Mr. Collins is doing in Rarotonga but I can only assume it involves alcohol, white women and plenty of music, most assuredly of the Hip-Hop variety. Maybe he’ll spend some quality time getting his boogie and booze on at Epalahame Lauaki’s baby mama’s club ? The world, or at least most people outside the South Pacific, may never know.

But all this not talking got your girl thinking (‘cause you know that’s what I do), anyone trying this hard not to say anything must have something worth keeping secret. I mean, a baby can’t be kept secret for very long but other life altering events sure as hell can! So in lieu of any real information Ms. GD has the next best thing – conjecture!

I’ve divined it! Next year, towards the end of Super 14, look for Mr. Collins to do a complete 180 on his position to stay in NZ by announcing his decision to move to Great Britain to continue his rugby career as well as to be closer to his child. Or keep watch for a young, “pommie” accented young woman and an…interesting…looking baby making appearances all over NZ with JC. Honestly, even with all his whoring around I don’t think Jerry is the type of guy to live too far away from his child for too long. This child is Mama and Papa Collins’ first grandbaby, at least from him, so you know his God-fearing parents have given him an earful about what is expected of him! Personally I feel it’s a matter of closing the gate after the bull has gotten loose but hey, who the fuck am I to judge?

Actually I think I will judge because I’m sick and tired of men and women the world over fucking without a damn condom and/or birth control and haphazardly bringing babies into the world and spreading diseases, sometimes simultaneously! This is basic shit here people! Yes people are living longer than ever with the AIDS virus but it’s still AIDS you jackasses! And AIDS isn’t the only STD out there; many of these diseases will stay with you for the rest of your life! Many diseases are becoming more and more resistant to drugs making previously curable ailments more difficult to subdue! And what about the ethics of all the rampant baby making? And why is she the English skank and Jerry is still clean as a whistle? Why are the people in NZ so willing to condemn Leon MacDonald for drinking out of the milk carton but keep mum on Jerry spreading his seed unabated? I don’t care if you didn't set out to be a role model Mr. Collins - you are one now and your inability to practice safe sex says more about your character than any  "live your dreams" speech to local rugby youth could ever say!

And what of this woman? Sigh…ladies…ladies…I swear the next time I hear a woman whine about what some man did to her I will grab her by the lapels and shake her until her head pops off! People, and men are people (no really they are!), only get away with what you let them and she agreed to fuck him without a condom! Sure I know condoms break and she could very well be in that 1% that still manages to get pregnant while using birth control but come on people! I mean Jerry is fine but ain’t nobody THAT hot to damn death! GIRL WHAT DID HE SAY TO YOU? Tell me so I can copyright that shit and make a packet off it!

And before you say it, yes I read the article and I think it’s great he’s supporting mama and baby but ya know, he ain’t doing shit but what he’s supposed to do! Men who financially support their children get no applause from me! You don’t celebrate when a salmon manages to swim upstream right? Dear Readers, I respect Mr. Collins and everyone like him who have overcome poverty and other struggles to become the great citizens they are today but I ask you, where do we draw the line?

Fuck it. It’s getting late and if none of ya’ll give a good gotdamn then why the hell should I right?

Play On Playas…Play On Playettes…

Until next time Dear Readers!

Smooches,
Glamour Diva

Don't be shy Dear Readers! If you have any gossip on any rugby player by all means drop us an email at rugbygossip@yahoo.com or Bebo and let us know. We don't discriminate, we'll take gossip on any player from any part of the world. Don't let the gossip die people!
 

4 comments so far.

  1. Debalina 7:17 PM, December 18, 2007
    oh Jerry. I'll be your baby mama too!
  2. Sex and the Sushi 9:18 PM, December 18, 2007
    Exactly Deb! You've just proven my point. Thanks so much for that!

    Smooches,
    Ms. GD
  3. UnderBoss 11:04 PM, December 19, 2007
    Well Congratulations Mr. Collins!
  4. Anonymous 12:15 PM, January 30, 2008
    Damn! i want him for sperm donator lol

Something to say?